Unknowing Pyschosis
Sweet Immolation sparked a little bug in my head that has been covered in a heavy film of mucus the last couple of days. Though I have little to say at the moment, I hope this can at least serve as a spring board for other thoughts to light up in my head.I'm still trying to figure this all out while trying to balance a Will and Way. I want to let go of everything. But as along as I feel tied to material things and debt, I don't know how to let go. As long as fear this crap, the longer it takes to get rid of it. And that's only part of my living paradox.
When I see people acting selfishly, or in a manner I find stupid, then I get on my high horse and start barking like some rapid dog. And nobody listens. Even if I try to go about an issue calmly, people remain stupid. For the first time in years this weekend, I was so frustrated at a situation that I actually had the words "I should just snuff it" go through my head. This feeling is componed by several stresses (feeling ill one of them) and in no way do I ever intend to do such a thing unless I can take several stupid people with me. But if I take them out the world would be a better place in my eyes and there would be no need to snuff myself.
Soya... I can't hear my muse today. Maybe she drowned in mucus and pixels. It's just the deamon shouting profanities again.
posted by iSirkus @ 9:45 PM
Comments: 1
